Brainchild of Boredom. November 3, 2008

That would make a good band name.
Anyway.

I love this blog. I can talk all I want… and no one cares. I don’t have to mean one bit of what I say… even though I usually do.  

 I miss my friends. I want to act like I don’t have a care in the world. I’m glad at this growing up business. I wouldn’t go back, not now that I’ve tasted a tiny bit of adulthood. It’s still hard, though, being a grownup… of sorts. You can’t be a grownup in college… not in the dorms, at least. 

I think that I miss working, though. Isn’t that weird? I think I might be a workaholic. Haha. Or maybe… I just value the trait of hard work and seek validity of myself as a good person through that. I don’t know. I do need money… so a job would be useful.

Forty-three days until I go home. It’s not that I hate it here. I’ll probably be more than ready to come back within a week… but I miss everything. Home… except I don’t actually have a home in Wyoming, at least not over christmas break, I will over summer break, but not this time around. I’ll probably just be sleeping at my grandparents house, working, and hanging out with my friends at their houses… then driving over to Kemmerer to sleep on my parents’ couch, then driving back… because that isn’t my home. That’s where my family lives… but it’s not where my heart is. I don’t even have a bed or a room or anything there. That place has nothing for me. Ugh. It’s all very confusing to me and that’s the best I can work it out for myself these days. 

I just need God, my friends, and music…  

Speaking of which… I discovered Dustin Kensrue and Tantric this weekend. Good shizz.
“I’m being myself, who are you?” – Down and Out, Tantric

Johnny and June October 27, 2008

Oh there’s something ’bout a man in black, 
Makes me want to buy a cadillac, 
Throw the top back, 
And roll down to Jackson town,

I wanna be there on the stage with you, 
You and I could be the next rage to,
Hear the crowd roar,
Make ‘em want more, 
I’ll kick the footlights out,

I wanna love like Johnny and June, 
Rings of fire burnin’ with you.
I wanna walk the line, walk the line 
‘Till the end of time, 
I wanna love, love ya that much,
Cash it all in, 
Give it all up,
When you’re gone, I wanna go too, 
Like Johnny and June,

I wanna hold you baby right or wrong,
Build a world around a country song,
Pray a sweet prayer, 
Follow you there, 
Down in history,

Heidi Newfield read my mind.
I want someone that I can’t imagine my life without. There’s so many awesome people in my life, especially right now… but I could live without about 95% of them… I want to add someone to that 5%.
Someone that loves and encourages me in all of my dreams.
Someone that wants to never leave my side.
Someone that I feel the same way about.
Someone  that makes me a better person.
Someone that makes me love God more.

Granted, I don’t want a love story exactly like Johnny Cash and June Carter… I’d like to avoid the drugs and divorces and all that… but she… she loved him. And he loved her. And they complimented and completed each other, I want someone who completes me, that fills in all the cracks my imperfections leave. And matches the qualities I need matched. :]

To My Last Year October 2, 2008

Last year,
It was all always all about you
I was your biggest fan
You held my porcelain heart in your hand
You crushed it
I hope it made you bleed, like you made me

So, what the hell are you gonna do?
I could have been, would have been
You played the fool, but I’ll do far better than you
Good bye last year
I’m moving on, and you’ll miss me

With this song you’ll see,
I could have been your world
Your perfect imperfection
I could have been your baby, your baby, your baby,
Goodbye last year,
Goodbye forever

Keep up the talk
I’m gone, what does that make you?
You lose, I win
Someday, you’ll see me with him
We’ll be forever
You’ll have been my never

Bahahaha. September 28, 2008

K… I heard this.

My friend texted me and asked me what ‘IDK’ meant. I said, ‘I don’t know’. She replied ‘UGH! Nobody does!’

Hahaha. Ah technology.

“I’m yours”, but not in a Jason Mraz sort of way. August 29, 2008

Weak and broken I come before You
Looking only for You
My strength I find in You
My rest only comes in Your arms

How could I do this on my own?
I find myself at the foot of your throne
Facedown and crying
But never alone

Waiting upon you
My strength is yours to renew
All I was, am, and will be
All belongs to you

Code Names July 9, 2008

Sad thing? My friends and I totally do this!

Emos. July 8, 2008

So true. Haha.

 

 

 

 

C.S. Lewis July 5, 2008

So true. C.S. Lewis was an incredibly brilliant man.

Back in the day… June 26, 2008

Haha. This made me laugh. It also reminded me how fast time is going… I mean, I’m seventeen. In my lifetime alone so many advncements have been made and events taken place… Life is gone in a snap. So you HAVE to live each moment. Live it up.

That’s what I intend to do in Cali. There’s so many things I’ve always wanted to do and try… there’s so many things I want to be. There’s this whole personality inside me that is bubbly and crazy and kind and fun and just great. That person… K’Lynn, came out at camp a little. The person I am at home, though, Kati. She’s faar too boring for my taste. She’s going away. I’m not sure she’s who I am.

I want to have a boyfriend. I want to dance. On a team. I want to sing in front of a thousand people. I want to sing my songs. I want to run down the beach in a bikini! I want to stay out until 2am. I want to be a flirt. i want to speak spanish. I want to help people. I want to be good at something! I want this blog to have a thousand hits! I want to be famous on YouTube!!

I don’t even know who I am or what I’m capable of yet… but I sure want to find out.

Hmm… June 18, 2008

So, since I last blogged…
Graduation was rather lame, but fun. Really, it was. It was just… anticlimatic.
They build it up to be a huge event… to the point where the real thing is kind of a letdown.

Now it’s over.

Camp was rockin’-awesome. I seriously wish I was a boy… I mean, they reenacted braveheart in their dorm with pillows. The girls talked about the worship team and went to sleep. Fo’ shizz?

Now… I have a job.

Pizza Hut. Will the dead-ends never cease?  And… I have to find another one. Soon. Ugh.

I also caught this horrendous cold. And, one of my eyes are swollen… I have no idea why. Ugh. NASTY.

It’s just… these days. It feels like I’m getting no where. The same thng followed by the same thing, ya know? I’m bored with my existence. Oy.

For the day:

Love ya bestie.